Influence People

by Queenie1

word count: 331

Every man, woman and child who lives on this earth can have an influence for good or for bad. Who we are or who we want to be makes all the difference. We are who we make ourselves to be.
If we as people think higher, good, positive, lofty thoughts and put off the bad, lower thoughts from our being we will accomplish more good and bless the lives of many people if we choose too. We will say good things and then we will do good things. Our positive choices and our good influence will radiate to all the people whom we meet. They will see us as the true person we truly are. Our inner beauty will show and radiate to all who truly know us, meet us or associate with us.
The same is true for the bad influences, bad or low thoughts that people have. We will have the same effects but in a bad way creating a negative influence. We can also radiate that bad, low ideals or influence upon others lives. All we have to do is look at some of the famous criminals in jail today. They started on the same path or journey in life that you and I did. They also made many choices over their lifetime which led them to where they are today. It was an accumulation of bad or low thoughts which took them down their road to where they are now.
We all have choices in this life of how we want to live and which way we want to go. We have to make good, right choices continually so that our good choices start taking us in the direction we want to go. We need to make the necessary changes in our lives so that we can end up where we want to be. Today is the first day of the rest of your life so you make the choice!

Did You Should On Yourself Today?

By Gloria Arenson
Published October 30, 2008
Personal Development
Rating: Unrated
Gloria Arenson
Gloria Arenson, MFT, treats stress, anxiety, trauma, phobias, and compulsions. She has authored How to Stop Playing the Weighting Game, A Substance Called Food, Born To Spend, Five Simple Steps to Emotional Healing, Freedom At Your Fingertips and Procrastination Nation. http://www.GloriaArenson.comView all articles by Gloria Arenson
I should get my car washed. I should pay my bills. I should eat less. I shouldn't sleep so late on the weekend. Our lives are filled with shoulds. Shoulds keep us on the straight and narrow path to goodness. What are shoulds and where did they come from? Of course we can trace them back to the original holy set, the Ten Commandments, but I am guessing that shoulds arose long before that.A should is created when a group of people agree about how the world is or might be. But this may differ from culture to culture and century to century. Democrats have different shoulds about the world than Republicans. Believers and non-believers differ about the shoulds that label us good or bad. The shoulds of your family and friends may be diametrically opposed to those of your neighbor.Shoulds lead to procrastination! Putting things off is often the result of your conflict with a should. That is because shoulds are inflicted on us from outside. From our earliest years we are told what a good boy or girl should or should not do to gain approval from parent, teacher, family, community, and the world. We are not given the opportunity to challenge these instructions. When we do we may land up going our own way and marching to our own drummer, but might also be carrying a load of guilt or shame about breaking away from what is expected.Who says I should wash my car, pay my bills, or eat less junk food? You may say that you do, but where did the original rule come from, and who laid it on you? Take a moment to think about some of the things you are procrastinating doing right now. Pick one.Pretend that you are standing in front of your local ATM about to make a withdrawal. This time you are going to withdraw some information. Pretend that
you are typing in this question instead of the amount of money: How young was I when I decided that I would be a bad person if I didn't ___? (Fill in the thing you are putting off) Take a deep breath and as you let it out a number will pop into your head.As you know your age you may automatically know who told you it was wrong or bad. If not, do the ATM routine again asking for that information. Remember what was happening back then and how you felt when you accepted that should. Take a moment to acknowledge all the guilt or shame you have felt throughout your life each time you resisted. How often have you struggled with this and other shoulds handed down from generation to generation?Please don't think I am telling you to drop all shoulds and rebel against everything. The result would create chaos and harm. Children need shoulds to help them conform to the expectations of their culture and to keep them safe. Yet, once we are grownups we can assess the rules and decide which ones fit our beliefs and which don't.Grownups can choose which expectations they want or choose to follow. Try this. Go back to the should you chose above. Say it out loud to yourself, "I should do my laundry." How do you feel? Is there tension in your stomach or throat? Do you feel ashamed of yourself for being lazy? Think about this for a moment. Do you want to do your laundry? If you don't then are you willing to take the consequences; after all you are an adult and responsible for your actions? Make a decision and say either "I choose to do my laundry," or "I choose to not do my laundry." Does that feel different when you say it out loud?Most people find that when they trade in their shoulds for choose to or choose not to, they get rid of a load of guilt and shame. See if you can eliminate the words should, shouldn't, must, and have to from your life this week and notice what happens.

In Order To Achieve, You First Have To Believe!

By Kristi Ambrose
Published October 31, 2008
Personal Development
Rating: Unrated
Kristi Ambrose
This Author is a HUGE fan of http://www.envisionfreedom.netView all articles by Kristi Ambrose
When you become a true believer in not only yourself but of the workings around you, it's always going to lead you where you want to go. Accepting something, is not the same thing as believing. In fact, the word believe by definition means; To have faith, confidence; to believe in a person. As the great philosopher F.W. Robertson said, "To believe is to be happy, to doubt is to be wretched. To believe is to be strong. Doubt cramps energy. Belief is power. Only so far as a man believes strongly, mightily, can he act cheerfully, or do anything that is worth doing." This somewhat coincides with Andrew Carnegie's quote; "Anything in life worth having is worth working for." And it's true, believing in yourself, and believing you will get the good things you deserve in life, can sometimes be very hard. But if you truly believe it, and you think its worth it, then it's also worth the work it takes to achieve it!But how exactly does someone start the process? It takes some pretty simple and yet pretty hard steps. Now, I know some of you might feel "odd" doing the things I'm about to tell you to do, but I can tell you that this works, and not only does it work but it also builds your confidence up, which then builds your belief up in yourself, which then leads to achieving all those things you want to achieve! You're going to feel goofy at first but it's just you and yourself so without further ado; Several times a day look into a mirror, look directly at your face, in your eyes and out loud say these words:In the infinity of life where I am, all is perfect, whole and complete. I support myself, and life supports me. I see evidence of the law working all around me, and in every area of my life.
I reinforce that which I learned to enjoy its ways. My day begins with gratitude and joy. I look forward with enthusiasm to the adventures of the day, knowing that in my life, "all is good." I love who I am, and all that I do. I am the living, loving, joyous expression of life. All is well in my world.Now if this sounds familiar to you, great! This is a positive affirmation by one of my favorite authors; Louise Hay. In her book titled "You Can Heal Your Life," there are several positive affirmations such as the one above between the chapters of the book. The one above, is one of 6 I say every morning before I do anything else, and every night before I go to bed. So yes, this does work because I know from experience. These positive affirmations are incredibly important, and it's also nice because you don't have to make up your own affirmations if you are uncomfortable with it, there are millions out there! You can also use these pre-written affirmations as your own and add or subtract your own stuff, its like a positive thinking script!I love these things, I find on days when I miss doing these for whatever my excuse is, I end up not feeling as good as if I would if I had done them. Its sort of like the domino effect. One thing happens that's negative, then you think about it too much, and oh hey here comes another negative thing and another and so on and so forth. But when I start my day out with affirmations, it's a mental reminder to myself or almost like a sugar pill, it gives me the courage to be positive and happy and joyous all day long. And this too, can work for you as well! Just gotta put a little "elbow grease" into it so to speak! Check out some affirmations online, print the ones out you like, and seriously do these for a month and you will see for yourself, I'm not delusional! This stuff really does work!

How To Accept Loss And Love Your Life Again

By Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
Published October 31, 2008
Personal Development
Rating: Unrated
Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
Mercedes Oestermann van Essen is an experienced coach, energy therapist, reiki master and author. Her book Heal Your Grief, Accept Your Loss And Love Your Life Again is available on her web site http://www.ThroughHappiness.comView all articles by Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
If you are past your teens you probably suffered the loss of someone you care for. After all, death is as common as birth but somehow we do not view it as part of the natural process of life. Our culture does not support grieving. Many of us are afraid of death, because we don't understand its innate mysterious and somewhat esoteric nature. Our view of death is formed by social conditioning. We suppress any emotions regarding the subject as best as we can. Unfortunately, this coping mechanism is encouraged by our society and holds many hidden dangers for our long term emotional and physical health. Any kind of suppressed emotion including bereavement and grief over the loss of someone dear, a divorce or other loss, can well truly ruin your life and you may not even know it. When faced with the prospect of someone dear to us dying we invariably are often pushed beyond our mental limits. As if coping with life's changed circumstances wasn't enough we also are pushed to the limits of our understanding of what life and death are all about. Losing someone suddenly, or when we are very young highlights these existentialist fears. Modern society has not got the support system extended family units used to provide in the past. Few take the time to connect properly with each other, let alone give each other the luxury of compassion and understanding when someone goes through the trauma of loss. People are often embarrassed to talk to people who suffered bereavement, feeling they need space. Again, our social conditioning promotes such attitudes. People who suffered loss want to talk, they do not want to be left to cope on their own.When the grief gets too much some people seek refuge in religions or cults. While it might give you temporary support, it is also a surefire way of giving away your personal power and ultimately your freedom. In fact, looking for support in that way can be downright dangerous and lead you into a place of delusion and may estrange you from yourself as well as the real world.Drugs, like alcohol, tranquillisers or antidepressants are socially accepted coping mechanisms. It is easy to become dependant on these and apart from the obvious dangers to your physical health, extended use of drugs can seriously ruin the quality of your life. I cannot understand the wide use of prescription anti depressants. They are down right dangerous often
leading to life long dependence. If you feel overwhelmed with emotions it stands to reason to seek help sooner rather then later. Because the sooner you do the easier and less painful will be your journey back to normality. Let us not forget that grieving over loss is an natural process and if faced and integrated properly can enhance your future rather then diminishing it. Any kind of trauma has a lesson hidden beneath it. You may not always see this when you are immersed in emotions, some of which you may have never felt before. Good counselling and also reading the right material can greatly assist you in dissolving grief, fear anger or guilt. When you are dealing with your issues and integrate the lessons you will learn about yourself and life in general, you will get over your loss so much faster.Loss and the accompanying emotions of bereavement and grief of course goes way beyond losing someone we care for. In fact, divorce, the loss of health or money are all in the same category and need to be coped with and integrated when they occur. Failure to do so can seriously affect the quality of your life. "Getting on with life" is the catch phrase of our society. Too many of us live by this delusory adage. This is all well and good, but I know from my own experience and my experience with many clients that unless you face the bereavement and work on fully integrating it there and then, you will suffer unnecessarily. Parts of your life will not work and sometimes 20 or 30 years later you may realise why, often you may never know where the real reason for your problems originated. That is a tragic waste indeed.Of course, this need not be so. With energy therapy and cognitive therapy you can work gently at resolving, integrating and healing the trauma of any kind of loss. Fortunately, there are many techniques available today and you can take your pick. EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique and Micro EFT are wonderful tools and, if used correctly, can help dissolve emotional blocks easily and quickly. Micro EFT is my preferred tool for dealing with recurring emotions, because it dissolves them gently a bit at a time.If you are lucky enough to realise that you may need help getting over the death of someone you care for or your divorce, or another loss, take steps now to help you recover your equilibrium faster and get your life back on track. Whatever your belief system, one thing is for sure, you have only one shot at this particular life and you may as well be kind to yourself and get the tools to navigate life's challenges as skilfully as you can.

To Achieve Your Life Goals Get Off The Hamster Wheel

By Bill Mann
Published November 2, 2008
Personal Development
Rating: Unrated
Bill Mann
There are nine types of positive experiences that successful and happy people across all cultures seem to share. To learn about these 9 intense experiences, and get yourself back on track to achieve personal success, visit: http://www.your9intenseexperiences-am.infoView all articles by Bill Mann
Do your life goals seem to be getting ever further away instead of closer? Have you given up on achieving them altogether? With all the bad economic news and turmoil, do you feel like you're losing ground across the board? If so, you aren't alone. Many, if not most people in the developed countries are feeling much the same. It's like you are trapped in a giant hamster wheel, running, running, running, but not getting anywhere. Why should we feel so trapped and stressed out? We are surrounded by technological marvels. Our standard of living is beyond that of even the wealthiest rulers only a few generations ago. And we have access to an almost limitless selection of products and lifestyles. I think we feel this way because we've lost touch with the traditions, customs, and rituals that people have traditionally based their lives around. Our lives are fast, indeed frantic. We are always on the run, always behind schedule, always chasing the next goal. As a result, we experience most of life shallowly. That is, we don't have the time or the energy to delve deeply into the meaningful experiences of our lives. The hamster wheel doesn't stop and we don't have time for more than a cursory glance. We experience life shallowly.
With endless interruptions and distractions, we don't have the time or energy to experience most things deeply or intensely. About the only things that can knock us off the hamster wheel for long are major crises. Family or personal disasters get our attention. So do massive disasters like September 11. But all too soon, we're back on the wheel, running for all we're worth, with our current events and experiences a blur, and our strongest impressions those left over from the latest disaster. No wonder we feel stressed out and helpless to achieve our personal goals.You can escape the hamster wheel life. You don't have to sell everything you own and abandon modern life either. If you can bring some positive intense experiences into your life, and dive deeply into them, you can transform yourself. Just stepping off the wheel once in a while can make a huge difference. It doesn't take a huge commitment of time, or lots of experimentation either. Until very recently, humans always included these kinds of experiences in their lives. In some places they still do. They are tried and true traditions and experiences that you can incorporate into your own life to counteract the negative aspects of our modern way of life. If you can find a way to include some of these in your life, you will find yourself happier, more relaxed, yet more successful.

If You Want To Achieve Your Goals Ask The Right Questions

By Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
Published November 2, 2008
Personal Development
Rating: Unrated
Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
Mercedes Oestermann van Essen is a human development coach, energy therapist and author. She has created the Happy Venn Diagram for environment, body and mind, a unique approach for happiness and success. Get your free report: 5 little known keys to happiness http://www.ThroughHappiness.comView all articles by Mercedes Oestermann van Essen
Yes, it is true, ask and you will be given. The trouble is this: We do not know how to ask correctly. Let me explain the simple premise upon which the above statement rests. Your mind is a wonderful tool. It will provide for you everything you ask of it. Alas, you need to ask in the right way. The part of your mind that is responsible for providing your wishes is the subconscious mind and the subconscious part works in a different way from your conscious mind. Once you understand this and know the difference between the two you will be able to converse properly with your very powerful subconscious mind. The subconscious mind needs to be treated with clear focus on what you want. This means that you need to word your commands positively and be concise. Let me demonstrate what I am talking about with an example: Let us assume that you are constantly thinking about how fed up you are with your financial situation and say things like: "I have had enough of all these money problems. Please let me not lose everything I have got." your mind sees only two things, namely that you are fed up and that you worry about losing everything you have. This kind of communication does not represent a clear command to your mind, but is designed to create total confusion. The end result at best
will be that nothing happens at all. However, it is far more likely that you will feel bad, despondent and those low energy feelings will pull you down into a negative mental hole from where you see nothing but doom and gloom. If you keep up this way of unfocused thinking you will eventually attract the thing you are most concerned with instead of attracting the things you wish for. So. let us stay with the above example. Instead of focusing on worrying about losing everything you have got, you should think about what you want to create. Maybe, this could be creating consistently more money than you are spending, or clearing your debt, or both.This is a good start, because now you are focusing on something you want to achieve. Always remember this important fact about the workings of your mind: Your mind does not understand when you say things like: "I do not want to be poor." It understands: I do want to be poor, not." This sentence makes no sense to your subconscious mind and you should therefore avoid any negatively framed statements. Be clear in your communication with your subconscious mind and avoid ambiguous questions when you are seeking solutions or ideas to achieve your goals. Simple questions work best. Be sure to focus your mind on your desired outcome. Expect to find the answer to your question now, or when you are ready, but always in timely fashion to assist you.

Develop Personal Development Skills

By Johnny C
Published July 15, 2009
Self Help
Rating: Unrated
Johnny C
Visit ours Personal Development Blog at PersonalDevelopmentMaster.com - Personal Development Articles and PersonalDevelopmentWisdom.com - Personal Reflection Affirmations. Our Personal Development blogs provides self improvement tips, motivation and personal developing skills, inspiration information to expand awareness, gain control of one's.View all articles by Johnny C
How to develop personal development skills - It is quite undeniable that the word contentment exists in any dictionaries. However, it does not exist in real life. This may sound to be an absurd notion but this is really true. This is due to the fact that as a human being, you should continuously strive to be a better person for your own sake and to be successful in life. As a matter of fact, this is the very essence of the personal development skills that is within your system. Thus, you have to learn on how you can improve and develop personal development skills for you to become a better person in time.Improving your self or striving to be a better person is not that bad. It is just that you want to be a better you. You want to be better in your field of career. You want to be a better individual. You want to be a better citizen of your nation. You just want to learn more and break away from your normal self. Furthermore, striving to be better and developing your skills can help you figure out if who you really are which can then lead you to the peak of success. Hence, it is just safe to say that aiming to be a better person can do you no harm.Improving your personality skills or your whole self, per se, entails a step-by-step process, which you should be aware of. Here is the process on how to improve and develop personal development skills:• Set your goals. This is the very first thing, which you should do in improving yourself. You have to determine if what you want in life and what you want to attain in the long run. This is essential in order for you to find out if what
you need do to be a better person.• Make your development plan. Once you have determined your goals in life, the next step is for you to make your own personal development plan. The plan will serve as your guide in achieving your goals.• Put your plan into action. Putting your personal development plan into action is the most difficult step in improving yourself. Nevertheless, you can make it somehow easier and simpler by just starting with small steps one at a time. After all, it is better to start with small steps slowly but surely rather than start with bigger insignificant steps forward.• Be responsible. You have to be responsible in everything and anything that you do. Accept all your shortcomings wholeheartedly and promise yourself to make everything correctly the next time around. Moreover, you also have to be open-minded when it comes to the results of your pursuit in becoming a better and successful person. In doing so, you can easily accept any possible failures and simply move forward.• Make sure to improve yourself daily. Personal development skills are already within you. You just need to improve those skills in order to be a better person, attain happiness, and be successful at the end of the day. In fact, it is preferable for you to improve your personal development skills daily to have fruitful results. You should be able to find some Personal Reflection Affirmations from some self improvement websites.Indeed, improving yourself is not an instant process but rather a gradual one. Hence, you really have to be aware of how you can slowly improve, as well as develop personal development skills in order to be a better individual and be successful in time.